Mosquitoes and Whisky
Chris Walter
Wow, this book is hard as fuck. Apparently it’s an autobiography and if it is, all I have to say to you, Chris, is HOW ARE YOU ALIVE? Granted, I grew up in a middle class Christian fucking nightmare in the interior of British Columbia and led (lead?) and extremely sheltered life, but still, how are you alive!?
Let me first start by saying that this is NOT a typical book for me. I love my paranormal romance novels like a fat kid loves chocolate and deep fried mars bars but on occasion I will stray from my safe little fantasy world to read something totally different. Yep, this was different all right.
Overflowing with unfulfilled teenage horniness, explosive rage outbursts and ramped alcohol and drug abuses, this book is the perfect birth control. I now NEVER want to have children. And definitely not a boy! True story. How he even survived the 24/7 masturbation marathons and permanent boners I have no idea. Throw into the mix every drug available, thievery, homelessness, multiple jail stints and violent physical brawls and it’s incredible he made it to 18. And his poor fucking mother, oh man, all the valium in the world couldn't have made her life any easier. At one point she must've looked down at her vagina and screamed, "How the HELL did I pop out such an emotionally broken lunatic?"
Due to the complete absurdity of his lifestyle, I couldn’t put the book down. Sure I cringed and may have puked in my mouth a little at certain parts but damn, his suffering makes for a great read. Plus, Chris (can I call you Chris?) is Canadian, so reading about how all this happened in Winnipeg and Calgary was shocking and bloody interesting. I feel like this couldn’t have possibly happened in the small town I grew up in, or maybe I couldn’t see it past the Pro Family vans and middle aged, cross wearing fat people.
Despite it’s train-wreck appeal, I am still left wondering how anyone, especially a child could be sooooooo annnnnnrgy. I mean he had a great family, he had a roof over his head and he wasn’t abused. What could have provoked such explosive anger and hatred of every other single person in his life? Also, how do you go 18 years, repeating the same mistakes over and over and NEVER learn from them? That takes fucking dedication. Bravo.
So in the end I am left feeling a bit violated, confused, anxious and overall glad that it’s over. I would definitely recommend the book to anyone wondering what utter self-destruction looks like, or to those contemplating having children. This honest and haunting book is a brief glimpse into the mind of a teenage boy; one that I am verrrrrry happy to have escaped alive from. Way to go Chris, you the man.
Chris Walter
Wow, this book is hard as fuck. Apparently it’s an autobiography and if it is, all I have to say to you, Chris, is HOW ARE YOU ALIVE? Granted, I grew up in a middle class Christian fucking nightmare in the interior of British Columbia and led (lead?) and extremely sheltered life, but still, how are you alive!?
Let me first start by saying that this is NOT a typical book for me. I love my paranormal romance novels like a fat kid loves chocolate and deep fried mars bars but on occasion I will stray from my safe little fantasy world to read something totally different. Yep, this was different all right.
Overflowing with unfulfilled teenage horniness, explosive rage outbursts and ramped alcohol and drug abuses, this book is the perfect birth control. I now NEVER want to have children. And definitely not a boy! True story. How he even survived the 24/7 masturbation marathons and permanent boners I have no idea. Throw into the mix every drug available, thievery, homelessness, multiple jail stints and violent physical brawls and it’s incredible he made it to 18. And his poor fucking mother, oh man, all the valium in the world couldn't have made her life any easier. At one point she must've looked down at her vagina and screamed, "How the HELL did I pop out such an emotionally broken lunatic?"
Due to the complete absurdity of his lifestyle, I couldn’t put the book down. Sure I cringed and may have puked in my mouth a little at certain parts but damn, his suffering makes for a great read. Plus, Chris (can I call you Chris?) is Canadian, so reading about how all this happened in Winnipeg and Calgary was shocking and bloody interesting. I feel like this couldn’t have possibly happened in the small town I grew up in, or maybe I couldn’t see it past the Pro Family vans and middle aged, cross wearing fat people.
Despite it’s train-wreck appeal, I am still left wondering how anyone, especially a child could be sooooooo annnnnnrgy. I mean he had a great family, he had a roof over his head and he wasn’t abused. What could have provoked such explosive anger and hatred of every other single person in his life? Also, how do you go 18 years, repeating the same mistakes over and over and NEVER learn from them? That takes fucking dedication. Bravo.
So in the end I am left feeling a bit violated, confused, anxious and overall glad that it’s over. I would definitely recommend the book to anyone wondering what utter self-destruction looks like, or to those contemplating having children. This honest and haunting book is a brief glimpse into the mind of a teenage boy; one that I am verrrrrry happy to have escaped alive from. Way to go Chris, you the man.
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