The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams
If you have been to the Our Favorites section above, you already know how I feel about this book. This book is one of the most interesting and hilarious books that I've ever read (the whole series actually). I've had a hard time writing this review as I just don't even know where to start! So, I've decided to skip the "I think this, I think that" bullshit and get right to the parts that made me pee myself when I read them. Below are some crazy new vocabulary from the book and my favorite laugh out loud quotes.
VOCAB
Sozzed, Diodes, Niggly, Myxomatosis, fjords? Don't ask me what they mean.
QUOTES:
CH 1
"Some factual information for you. Have you any idea how much damage that bulldozer would suffer if I just let it roll straight over you?"
"How much?" said Arthur.
"None at all" said Mr Prosser...
CH 6
Now it is such a bizarrely improbable coincidence that anything so mindbogglingly useful could have evolved purely by chance that some thinkers have chosen to see it as the final and clinching proof of the non-existence of God. The argument goes something like this:
"I refuse to prove that I exist," says God, "for proof denies faith, and without faith I am nothing."
"But," says Man," The Babel fish is a dead giveaway, isn't it? It could not have evolved by chance. It proves you exist, and so therefore, by your own arguments, you don't. QED."
"Oh dear," says God, "I hadn't thought of that," and promptly vanished in a puff of logic.
"Oh, that was easy," says Man, and for an encore goes on to prove that black is white and gets himself killed on the next zebra crossing.
Arthur grabbed hold of it and tried to stop his hands shaking. He pressed the entry for the relevant page. The screen flashed and swirled and resolved into a page of print. Arthur stared at it.
"It doesn't have an entry!" he burst out.
Ford looked over his shoulder.
"Yes it does," he said, "down there, see at the bottom of the screen, just under Eccentrica Gallumbits, the triple-breasted whore of Eroticon 6."
Arthur followed Ford's finger, and saw where it was pointing. For a moment it still didn't register, then his mind nearly blew up.
"What? Harmless? Is that all it's got to say? Harmless! One word!"
Ford shrugged.
"Well, there are a hundred billion stars in the Galaxy, and only a limited amount of space in the book's microprocessors," he said, "and no one knew much about the Earth of course."
"Well for God's sake I hope you managed to rectify that a bit."
"Oh yes, well I managed to transmit a new entry off to the editor. He had to trim it a bit, but it's still an improvement."
"And what does it say now?" asked Arthur.
"Mostly harmless," admitted Ford with a slightly embarrassed cough.
"Mostly harmless!" shouted Arthur.
CH 9
"Haaaauuurrgghhh ..." said Arthur as he felt his body softening and bending in unusual directions.
"Southend seems to be melting away ... the stars are swirling ... a dustbowl ... my legs are drifting off into the sunset ... my left arm's come off too."
A frightening thought struck him: "Hell," he said, "how am I going to operate my digital watch now?"
He wound his eyes desperately around in Ford's direction.
CH 11
Marvin regarded it with cold loathing whilst his logic circuits chattered with disgust and tinkered with the concept of directing physical violence against it. Further circuits cut in saying, Why bother? What's the point? Nothing is worth getting involved in. Further circuits amused themselves by analysing the molecular components of the door, and the humanoids' brain cells. For a quick encore they measured the level of hydrogen emissions in the surrounding cubic parsec of space and then shut down again in boredom. A spasm of despair shook the robot's body as he turned. 'Come on,' he droned, 'I've been ordered to take you down to the bridge. Here I am, brain the size of a planet and they ask me to take you down to the bridge. Call that job satisfaction? 'Cos I don't.'
CH 18
I left out the entire Whale/Petunias part here, as we've all read it a million times and know exactly how witty it is. If you don't remember and need a refresher, click here.
CH 19
"Nuts to your white mice," he said.
CH 25
"Molest me not with this pocket calculator stuff" - Deep Thought.
And with that, I sign off. I managed to pick up the rest of the series at a recent book sale so I am looking forward to rediscovering them again. If you have just to read this book, or the series, I recommend you do. I have met people who do not like the book or find it funny (KAT! tsk tsk ;) but I suggest you give it a go, it's worth the risk. Toodles.
If you have been to the Our Favorites section above, you already know how I feel about this book. This book is one of the most interesting and hilarious books that I've ever read (the whole series actually). I've had a hard time writing this review as I just don't even know where to start! So, I've decided to skip the "I think this, I think that" bullshit and get right to the parts that made me pee myself when I read them. Below are some crazy new vocabulary from the book and my favorite laugh out loud quotes.
VOCAB
Sozzed, Diodes, Niggly, Myxomatosis, fjords? Don't ask me what they mean.
QUOTES:
CH 1
"Some factual information for you. Have you any idea how much damage that bulldozer would suffer if I just let it roll straight over you?"
"How much?" said Arthur.
"None at all" said Mr Prosser...
CH 6
Now it is such a bizarrely improbable coincidence that anything so mindbogglingly useful could have evolved purely by chance that some thinkers have chosen to see it as the final and clinching proof of the non-existence of God. The argument goes something like this:
"I refuse to prove that I exist," says God, "for proof denies faith, and without faith I am nothing."
"But," says Man," The Babel fish is a dead giveaway, isn't it? It could not have evolved by chance. It proves you exist, and so therefore, by your own arguments, you don't. QED."
"Oh dear," says God, "I hadn't thought of that," and promptly vanished in a puff of logic.
"Oh, that was easy," says Man, and for an encore goes on to prove that black is white and gets himself killed on the next zebra crossing.
Arthur grabbed hold of it and tried to stop his hands shaking. He pressed the entry for the relevant page. The screen flashed and swirled and resolved into a page of print. Arthur stared at it.
"It doesn't have an entry!" he burst out.
Ford looked over his shoulder.
"Yes it does," he said, "down there, see at the bottom of the screen, just under Eccentrica Gallumbits, the triple-breasted whore of Eroticon 6."
Arthur followed Ford's finger, and saw where it was pointing. For a moment it still didn't register, then his mind nearly blew up.
"What? Harmless? Is that all it's got to say? Harmless! One word!"
Ford shrugged.
"Well, there are a hundred billion stars in the Galaxy, and only a limited amount of space in the book's microprocessors," he said, "and no one knew much about the Earth of course."
"Well for God's sake I hope you managed to rectify that a bit."
"Oh yes, well I managed to transmit a new entry off to the editor. He had to trim it a bit, but it's still an improvement."
"And what does it say now?" asked Arthur.
"Mostly harmless," admitted Ford with a slightly embarrassed cough.
"Mostly harmless!" shouted Arthur.
CH 9
"Haaaauuurrgghhh ..." said Arthur as he felt his body softening and bending in unusual directions.
"Southend seems to be melting away ... the stars are swirling ... a dustbowl ... my legs are drifting off into the sunset ... my left arm's come off too."
A frightening thought struck him: "Hell," he said, "how am I going to operate my digital watch now?"
He wound his eyes desperately around in Ford's direction.
CH 11
Marvin regarded it with cold loathing whilst his logic circuits chattered with disgust and tinkered with the concept of directing physical violence against it. Further circuits cut in saying, Why bother? What's the point? Nothing is worth getting involved in. Further circuits amused themselves by analysing the molecular components of the door, and the humanoids' brain cells. For a quick encore they measured the level of hydrogen emissions in the surrounding cubic parsec of space and then shut down again in boredom. A spasm of despair shook the robot's body as he turned. 'Come on,' he droned, 'I've been ordered to take you down to the bridge. Here I am, brain the size of a planet and they ask me to take you down to the bridge. Call that job satisfaction? 'Cos I don't.'
CH 18
I left out the entire Whale/Petunias part here, as we've all read it a million times and know exactly how witty it is. If you don't remember and need a refresher, click here.
CH 19
"Nuts to your white mice," he said.
CH 25
"Molest me not with this pocket calculator stuff" - Deep Thought.
And with that, I sign off. I managed to pick up the rest of the series at a recent book sale so I am looking forward to rediscovering them again. If you have just to read this book, or the series, I recommend you do. I have met people who do not like the book or find it funny (KAT! tsk tsk ;) but I suggest you give it a go, it's worth the risk. Toodles.
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